What if I decide to stay here? At BSU and finish my degree here…
No. I don’t want that. I want to leave here.
But money is really an issue… or is it not? I guess I could always get a loan from the government and pay it back later.
Right now, I’m too afraid of making mistakes. I shouldn’t be. We can lean through our mistakes, so it’s okay to make mistakes. No one’s perfect, and you can’t perfectly plan something.
I'm not sure what to do... what I should do... so confused... I guess that's what too many option does? There are so many chances and opportunities; so many choices and what I could've do, but I just don't know how and what to chose!
I'm scared. Yeah, I am.
I know what I ultimately want: I want to get a degree then be with her. Well, literally with her.
And?
Do I really want to do design? I don't know...
What if I won't be able to transfer? What if I fail? Then I'll end up here... will it then be too late to change my major again?
Dad probably won't let me just get an Graphic Design degree here... then I'll have to study CS... but I'm not really sure if that could be something I enjoy...
What should I do?
They keep use financial issue giving me pressure and I'm so sick of it. It's scaring me.
Why can't I be free?
Slave of society.
And what about getting a job? Should I get a part-time job now? But I have to study hard. And try to make time for her... I don't know what to do...
I'm so scared.
Fuck all this shit. Being an adult sucks! Growing up sucks.
Being not free sucks. I don't want to care about what you think, I want to do whatever I want to do.
But nooooooo. I'm stuck here.
My minds rushing, I'm panicking. I'm lost and confused.
I want to live with passion, but instead I'm struggling and striving. That's not living...
I guess I'm not really happier... just hollower.
Sometimes I just want to die. How depressing is that, I just want to die when I think of the future.
Only when I think of her, it gives me a stronger will to stay alive... is that sad?
Help me...... helft mir.
No. I don’t want that. I want to leave here.
But money is really an issue… or is it not? I guess I could always get a loan from the government and pay it back later.
Right now, I’m too afraid of making mistakes. I shouldn’t be. We can lean through our mistakes, so it’s okay to make mistakes. No one’s perfect, and you can’t perfectly plan something.
I'm not sure what to do... what I should do... so confused... I guess that's what too many option does? There are so many chances and opportunities; so many choices and what I could've do, but I just don't know how and what to chose!
I'm scared. Yeah, I am.
I know what I ultimately want: I want to get a degree then be with her. Well, literally with her.
And?
Do I really want to do design? I don't know...
What if I won't be able to transfer? What if I fail? Then I'll end up here... will it then be too late to change my major again?
Dad probably won't let me just get an Graphic Design degree here... then I'll have to study CS... but I'm not really sure if that could be something I enjoy...
What should I do?
They keep use financial issue giving me pressure and I'm so sick of it. It's scaring me.
Why can't I be free?
Slave of society.
And what about getting a job? Should I get a part-time job now? But I have to study hard. And try to make time for her... I don't know what to do...
I'm so scared.
Fuck all this shit. Being an adult sucks! Growing up sucks.
Being not free sucks. I don't want to care about what you think, I want to do whatever I want to do.
But nooooooo. I'm stuck here.
My minds rushing, I'm panicking. I'm lost and confused.
I want to live with passion, but instead I'm struggling and striving. That's not living...
I guess I'm not really happier... just hollower.
Sometimes I just want to die. How depressing is that, I just want to die when I think of the future.
Only when I think of her, it gives me a stronger will to stay alive... is that sad?
Help me...... helft mir.
文章標籤
全站熱搜
現在進行式 (2)
*****
*****